Sunday, May 2, 2010

Anticipation

Life is hard. We can always find something to complain about. It’s doesn’t matter if you are the CEO of some big company in New York or if you are the youngest brother of 5 in a family that lives in Kabwe, Zambia; life is hard. Most of us fall somewhere in the middle. We want more. We want the next thing. It is all relative too. If you have $10 and want $1 more or if you have $1,000,000 and want $100,000 more; it’s all the same thing. We all want.


I have a good memory. And I can recall quite clearly when I was 5 years old wanting something very much. It was this little bathtub boat that had a tiny motor on the back. It was green and yellow. They sold it at Fred Meyer for $4.99. That was a lot of money for our family back then. At least it was for something so useless. I would dream about the day that I would finally buy that boat and bring it home. For literally months I thought about it. Every time we went to Fred Meyer to shop for groceries I would run to the toy section and make sure it was still there. I would hide it in different places all over the store to make sure no one else would buy it. I was baffled every time it was gone from my previous hiding place. Those Fred Meyer employees were sneaky. Ironically, I am sure there were at least a few lucky kids that found a new boat in their parents newly bought items. Every time I hid it in a new tool box I made a construction workers kid real happy I am sure. The thought of actually HAVING that boat was almost too much for me to handle. My mom knew how much I wanted it and would tell me grand stories of how I could attain it through my good deeds. Once I achieved the proper prerequisites I would always mess it up with my poor behavior soon after. Once I got my act together and managed to get my mom’s promise, the wait was soon to be over. Three days later I had it. For the next week I was the cleanest I had ever been; bath after bath. It was pure ecstasy. The boat had just enough buoyancy to hold two Lego men and their spears. There was just one problem. It wore off. Months of anticipation burned off in about 8 days.   

Now I think that everyone reading this (Hi Grandma) can identify with this situation. We always want something or someone. Wanting something is not a horrible feeling. The anticipation I felt for attaining that boat was not a painful feeling, but more of a longing. It even led to me behaving better. When we get into trouble is when our desires get in the way of what is best for us. If we make decisions that are based on attaining that person or thing we are after, it better have a positive effect on you and the people around you. If not, it might not be something you should devote your brain powers to. Easier said than done, I know. My point is not to try and forget wanting things that you know you shouldn’t or can’t have. But rather to give you the free pass to enjoy anticipating the good things to come. I didn’t regret getting that boat, but the amount of time I enjoyed it was nowhere close to the amount of time I enjoyed wanting it. Focus on wanting good things in life, not just on the good things you already have (that is a good practice however). Shift you desires to good ones and enjoy the ride. Anticipation is good. Longing is good. It is not just about where you have been or what you have now, but also on what is to come. Sometimes we are let down, but that is better than wanting something and never getting it or having no aspirations at all.
I will skip the obvious Jesus analogy. You can use your own imagination. Oh what amazing things we have to anticipate…

ALB

1 comment:

  1. Good post Miah. I think your posts are extra good and interesting when you tell about when you were little. I like the things you say you thought and did as a little guy. :-) Good job!

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